BasicInfo
Please note that every effort has been made to keep all content of the diary entries identical to the original (including things like line breaks). The only modification that has been made is standardization of the dates, since several different formats were used (m.d.y, m/d/y, m-d-y). You may notice that some entries end abruptly or trail off - this is not due to incorrect transcription - feel free to compare to the original pdf copy at bidendiary.com.
DiaryEntry
2019-02-08
What is my part in this? My part is that I spoke to too many people about my situation with Kevin. I asked for too many opinions and tried to get validation that I am good enough, sexy enough, hot enough etc... And for that I am sorry. It's over with Kevin and he has to deal with his own drama. I don't think after this that I will be able to look at him the same way again. I am going to walk away from this all with my head held high. Kevin is emotionally immature as am I – I realize it's not what I want anymore – so maybe that's the gift in this all and the lesson that I should only tell people I trust and who have my back – about anything. It's about being a woman and not the little girl. I think I re-victimize myself over + over again. I should never talk to men about sex or any of that bullshit.
LinguisticAnalysis
| Sentiment (-1=negative, 1=positive) | |
| Score | 0.02897450037963 |
| Emotion Scores (0-1) | |
| Joy | 0.48708636961134 |
| Sadness | 0 |
| Fear | 0 |
| Anger | 0 |
| Surprise | 0 |
| Disgust | 0 |
| Key Words | |
| part people anymore talk think girl little woman trust tell | |
Sentiment Score
Emotion Graph
Word Cloud
DiaryEntry
2019-02-08
And so, we start again. This really gets old. I am getting old. I had to block Kiaddi b/c it just isn't good for the two of us to hang out. I am red, inflamed, and staying in doors today b/c I have to. Eric left detox + called me this morning. He seems sweet, distant, tired, and confused. It's a lot with me moving and dad potentially running. I'm going to a meeting at some point today. I will not continue down this path or live this wasteful life.
LinguisticAnalysis
| Sentiment (-1=negative, 1=positive) | |
| Score | -0.055487913207407 |
| Emotion Scores (0-1) | |
| Joy | 0 |
| Sadness | 0.1373381534897 |
| Fear | 0 |
| Anger | 0 |
| Surprise | 0.24951068938791 |
| Disgust | 0.05126282164978 |
| Key Words | |
| old start wasteful path continue today point going lot dad | |
Sentiment Score
Emotion Graph
Word Cloud